Proletarian

Sunday, March 27, 2005

Blessed Easter

I was worried for a while this morning, but after a bit of affectionate pestering and stubborness, I managed to get us all off to church this morning. Praise God!! Now, I wonder if I can motivate DH to make the same decision next week. lol

Church was nice, though I admit to being slightly distracted by DD. She isn't used to sitting with us during the church service, since during her younger years she played in the nursery. I believe that she is quite old enough to adjust to sitting quietly. As I was reminded of today though, this will take some more lessons in obedience.

It was nice to see my friends from church, though mildly depressing at the same time. DH and I had previously been involved in a "Homebuilders" group, with other members of our church. It is one of the big ways that we actually made some friends, and the lessons on communication really went a long way toward helping us to rectify some of our marriage woes. Unfortunately though, not many of the people in our group are doing as well as we are. We found out today that we haven't missed anything with our group in the time that we've been out of church. They have not been meeting. More to the point, now half of our group (2 of 4 couples) are divorcing. We had already known about one couple, and today we found out about another. It does make it difficult to know what to do with our group. I know that our leaders feel as though they have failed us, but they aren't responsible for people not honoring their marriages through the trials. Everyone has been open about their reasons for divorcing, and none of it is serious enough to warrant that kind of action. Still, even after talks, folks seem pretty set in their plans and are not open to being swayed toward reconciling their marriages. It's really depressing to see so many of my friends' marriages fail.

After church, we all went over to DH's family gathering, since my own family doesn't gather anymore. My little sister is the only other family member around who considers herself to be Christian, so the others don't celebrate Easter. But, we had a nice time while visiting with DH's family, and DD had plenty of time to play with her cousins.

I've been very tired this evening for some reason. I'm guessing that it has something to do with funky sleep last night. Hopefully it means that I will sleep real well tonight. If I keep this up though, DH is going to start teasing me even more than he already does. I keep falling asleep during our movies, in the evening, which has earned me some gentle teasing. I'm afraid that if I keep zonking out, he's going to ask me if I remembered to take my teeth out, to put them in a cup on the bedside table. lol

Speaking of getting older, DH is acting weird. He keeps telling me that I'm not allowed to have a birthday party, and that he won't bake me a cake. It's actually kind of funny. He puffs out his chest when he tells me these things in front of friends and family, and I tease him a bit. I think that he is up to something. Since I am a curious cat, I'll just sit back and watch the show. In the meantime, I have to make out a list of things that I will need for this friday. While *I* am not having a birthday party, I am hosting a party for my niece. She is turning two, and my little sister asked if we could have her party over here. Little sis can help me clean up and everything, and I told her that I would make the munchkin's cake. I just like doing that. For some reason, I just like baking. I'm not particularly good at it, but it is fun. I also like to decorate cakes, though I am far from a professional. I did invest in the different bag tips though, which makes it great fun to draw pretty pictures on cakes. I just have to come up with a theme for munchkin's cake.

DH has been asking me what I want for my birthday, and I think that I have finally found something. While it is on the more expensive side, DH said that he will get me the rowing machine that I want if I promise to use it. Of course, this is such a wonderful blessing, and I quickly agreed. I have been looking for a particular type of rowing machine for a while now, like the ones that I used to use for conditioning while I was on crew. However, everything that I found was WAY too expensive. This one is more in our price range, and still works off the same type of system. So, I will be able to get my exercise without the jarring movements that cause my knees so much pain. It should also help me quite a bit with my flexibility, which will help my back a whole lot. I just have to remember to always do my stretching, to keep my hamstrings from tightening, and pulling my pelvis out of alignment. I seem to have developed a funky back, which likes to make it impossible for me to move, if I don't do the proper stretching and exercises to maintain my core strength.

Anyway, I am really excited at the prospect of getting the rowing machine and getting in some good workouts. I love the fluid motion, and it really does take me back to the way it feels to have that icy air blowing over my face as we slid through the water, eating up the river. I've never been a particularly graceful person, but I could row. My hand-eye coordination always stunk, and I couldn't play more conventional sports at all, but it was great to have that connection with the other girls in my boat. To act as one body, moving toward the same singular goal, it was exhilarating. I only wish that I would have been able to stick with it longer. Unfortunately, I took a bad fall while running one afternoon, and I was injured pretty bad. My parents were afraid that I had broken my patella, but while that remained intact, it was too much to an already injured knee. With all of the stress from running 6+ miles per day, daily practices, and that horseback riding accident, my knee is just gone. My doc said that there was nothing they could do for me, because they would not replace my knee at such a young age, and they didn't know if it would take with my crooked bones. So, now I search out any way to exercise without crippling myself. I've tried low impact aerobics, and it just isn't low impact enough. I can't walk very well, and running is out of the question. Now, if I had a swimming pool in my yard, that would be awesome. I'm too poor though. So, it looks as though I will just practice my stroke on the sea of beige carpet in my living room, and teach DD proper form from a young age. *laughs*

Posted at 11:05 pm by Jenna
Comment (1) Linky

Friday, March 25, 2005

This Good Friday

I can find two things to consider 'good', on this Good Friday. Number one is that I am here for it. I'm alive, and healthy, for as much as I know. I'm really appreciating that today, as we watch Terri Schiavo wane and grow weaker with every passing hour. My heart aches for her.

My second reason actually trumps the first, and makes it worth being here on this Friday. Thank you Lord for offering up your Son, Jesus the Christ, to die a horrible death to pay our (my) sin debt. It is such a tormenting thing, to be so eternally happy and greatful for such an awful event. At this time, I am having a more difficult time focusing on the resurrection, since my heart is still pinned to the cross. My heart is in a place of mourning, but I have hope deep within my soul. It is quietly waiting there for my small human thinking and feeling can catch up to the wonder and majesty of our God. I am such a very small creature, only able to absorb so much at one time.

By this point, I am torn over Terri's plight. I have little faith that Gov. Jeb Bush will show courage and stand up for this woman who is in so much need of help. He pretends that his hands are tied, as though millions of people in this country, and around the world, cannot read the U.S. Constitution. How many legal minds does it take, speaking out through various avenues, before Jeb Bush realizes that he can't just bluff his way out of this and pretend that he has no remaining options? I wonder if it will help him to sleep better at night. I honestly do.

Tonight, I am going to spotlight Slobokan's Site O'Schtuff. I'm such a mush that my eyeballs wanted to spring a leak, reading My Prayer For Terri. Of course, anyone who visits at all has probably noticed that my eyeballs keep wanting to do that lately. I really am turning into an emotional mush. Then again, I have a daughter. I don't know what I would do if anyone told me that I had to sit and do nothing while someone starved her to death. I would go insane, probably in a literal sense. A mother spends her whole life trying to bring up her children, teach them about God, love them to the best of her ability from the very depths of her heart and soul. To ask a mother to sit by and watch someone murder her child, it's beyond me.

I've been reading and reading, and reading some more. I think that the ligaments holding my eyeballs have been sprained, just following legal jargon and news articles. So many people are up in arms, complaining because so many people are paying attention to Terri's case, when so many other people in our fair country are suffering similar plights. Let me say that this isn't JUST about one person. While we all definitely care about the precious life of Terri Schiavo, this is also about all of those other people out there who are being given a raw deal because they have become "inconvenient". Take a gander at the gazillion blogs out there, so many people fighting for the cause of this one woman, and ask them if it is just for Terri that they fight. Take a walk on down to Florida, and ask the people gathered around the hospice if they would protest and go to jail if it were a different person suffering a similar fate. If I were a betting woman, I would bet you that they would enthusiastically say that this reaches so much farther than simply the unjust and cruel killing of Terri. These kinds of things impact our society in such huge ways, and have tremendously lasting effects.

Posted at 09:46 pm by Jenna
Comments (2) Linky

Thursday, March 24, 2005

An Unusual Day

I have been experiencing lots of unexpected company today, first my little siter, and now my dad. It is quite funny, that I seem to be the person for great company of late. Ok, well, not exactly. My sister needed money, and dad just wanted somewhere to hang out until his girlfriend gets off of work and can pick him up. Funny though, is that I don't really care that much. It is good to have people around, even if it isn't the lure of my great company that is the draw.

So, I was able to spend some time with my niece and nephew today, huggling and snuggling them. I especially spent some time with my nephew, since I don't seem to have enough quiet time of late to really love on him. But, since I had some slow moments, I sat down with him and stroked his hair, made googly sounds, and played with him. What a doll. My niece, she just had lots of fun with DD, dropping cereal all over the carpet. Those two are real funny together. Hey, at least they cleaned it up.

This afternoon, after my little sister left, my dad showed up out of the blue. He was out with his girlfriend, and they miscalculated the time that she had until she had to be at work. With no time left to run home, dad called to see if he could hang out here. So, now I have company. Interesting enough, my company is asleep in my bed, with a head-cold. I must remember to strip the bed and use some lysol before zonking out for the night, since my own immune system seems to be struggling lately. But, it was great to have someone to sit down to tea with. We talked for a while, and dad gave me advice on how to fix the finish on my dining table. We even watched a little tv together before he got too tired.

I'll say that the real treat of the afternoon was of a different sort though. Giving free rein to my sense of frustration, I wrote to Jeb Bush today. Oh, I was perfectly polite and sweet. No harsh commentary here, but I do hope that he does the right thing, before it is too late. He DOES have the power to take Terri into protective custody, regardless of what Greer says, and I hope that he utilizes the power. Of course, that isn't usually how politics go though. It's always more of a matter of covering one's own bum. Disappointing, usually, but the reality is pretty sickening these days. I read old letters and such from history, penned by earlier men in goverment, and I am so deeply shocked by the changes in the men that I see today. There seems to be little boldness, conviction, willingness to do right, and love of God in the leaders of today. It makes my heart sad. :o ( What is the worst that could happen to Jeb Bush if he stepped in and took protective custody of Terri? He stands the chance of maybe going through an impeachment process. I would say that it would be a far better fate than to have it pester him all the days of his life that he could have worked to save the life of an innocent woman, and didn't.

*sigh* I'm still trying to figure out what to do with my anger, a way to channel it into something positive. I am a firm believer that anger can be righteous, and should be used to effect positive change. The ways to accomplish this, however, have not been so easy to find. So, in the meantime, I'm going to cook dinner and have a large glass of water. I'm going to enjoy my meal and be incredibly grateful to have it. I'm going to thank God from the bottom of my heart, and pray for the day when Terri is no longer starving and thirsty, whether on this earth or in heaven. I hope against hope that men will stand up and do the right thing by her, but at the same time, I am jaded enough to believe that the evil in men's hearts will dominate this situation. As I grow older, every day I see something that opens my eyes just a bit more as to why God would ever want to flood the earth and destroy His creation. I'm pretty disgusted by the nature of man, and I have much lower standards than God. It's amazing that He loves us enough to offer salvation through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. We definitely deserve none of it. Thank God for His mercy.

Posted at 04:51 pm by Jenna
Make a comment Linky

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Awesome Posties

Here is a wonderful post that I found in my wanderings of the web today, dealing with Terri's situation and our culture of death. Me, I have nothing more to say about it, except that I continue to pray for Terri, and to pray for control over my own righteous anger. In the meantime though, lots of steadfast people are blogging on the events as they unfold. Me, I'm going to just keep reading their good thoughts as I peruse the headlines.

Posted at 06:08 pm by Jenna
Comments (2) Linky