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reflections on....

Created To Be His Help Meet
by Debi Pearl

 

Chapter 13
The Great Mystery
-A wise woman understands that her husband's need to be honored is not based on his performance, but on his nature and his God-ordained position. She learns quickly to defer to his ideas or plans with enthusiasm. She looks for ways to reverence him. She knows this is God's will for her life.-

I have really enjoyed this chapter, probably because it really brings everything back home, to the real focus. The place where our eyes and hearts should always be trained, is the Lord. In this chapter, Debi does that, in illustrating that our earthly marriage is a humble parallel of the relationship that Christ has with his church.

"Your marriage to your husband is preparing you for your marriage to Christ. You may say, 'But it would be easy being married to Christ.' Then you don't know your Bible. What if your husband required you to offer your son upon an alter as a burnt sacrifice? That is what God required of Abraham. What if your husband killed you for lying? That is what God did to Sapphira. For a woman to usurp authority over a man is an affront to God Almighty, like treason in the camp. It would be like a man taking authority over Christ, or like the Church becoming jealous of Jesus' leadership and taking authority unto itself."

This is one part of the book that really had me laughing, not because it is particularly funny, but because I've heard that line so many times. "Oh, if my husband were like Christ, then we would never have any problems. Of course I would sumit and honor him." Like Debi pointed out, many women don't think fully on what they are saying when they make that type of statement. I know that in my marriage, my husband asks far less of me than my God ever has. I think that it is wonderful that I get this "practice run" to learn more fully how to be obedient, submissive, and full of reverence.

To compliment this chapter, Debi includes some short definitions to help women understand what they are being called to do, which include:

1. Obedience is doing what you know the other person wants you to do.
2. Submission is your heart giving over to the other person's will.
3. Reverence is more than just doing what a man expects or demands. It is an act of a woman's will to treat him with a high degree of regard and awe.

Oh no, oh no, I'm not saying that any of this is particularly easy. Maybe it is for some women, but I must not be one of them. I am very much like my parents, each of them is as stubborn as a mule, and as hard-headed as a mountain goat. (isn't that a lovely picture? lol) Yup, that's me. So, it is really a feat to wrestle with my own flesh and put away my very unfeminine qualities that lead me to arrogance and a spirit of domination. I'll be quite frank in saying that I can be an ugly creature when not softened by the Lord.

Maybe it is because of my nature, I feel most confident in bolstering other women, and am very jubilant in praising God. I know that by my own power, I can not accomplish the task of placing my husband's desires before my own, doing things that he asks of me, or going that extra mile to show him how much I love and appreciate him- just because he is. It may feel like a completely unattainable task to some women, but I'm here to tell you that if it is what you desire, to honor your husband, God will help you every step of the way. He enables His people to do what He says is right. Pray, pray, pray! :o )

Further on in the chapter, Debi shares a letter from a woman who makes a point to uplift and reverence her husband, even though he is FAR from the "perfect" husband. In the letter, the woman shares about how she honors her husband through his position as the father of their son, how she proclaims to the world that her husband is "#1 Dad".

"She is reverencing God by reverencing her husband, not because her husband is a fit representative of Christ, and not because he is a worthy substitute, but because God placed her in subjection to her husband."

Yet again, we are reminded that it isn't because of a husband's merit that he is respected and honored. This is a very big deal, which is probably why it is repeated so often. I know that I, personally, hear many women saying how they will respect their husband when he is worthy "enough". Hey, two wrongs do not make a right. Wives are not justified in disobeying God because their men are not doing what they should be. When we know that we are not acting in accordance to God's will for us, it is our duty to step up to the plate and to make things right, regardless of how unworthy we think our husbands are. As Debi says, when you reverence your husband, you are reverencing God.

"If her faithfulness is never rewarded with a new-birth change in her husband, her commitment is not wasted, for the grace that God is working in her heart is making her supremely fitted to be the bride of Christ."

 

Amen! It really took me a while to catch on here. I was reading a different book at the time, called "A Love Worth Giving" by Max Lucado, when this realization hit me. I had a real "D'uh" moment. God sees everything. He knows the condition of our hearts. Everything that we do to please Him, He sees. Our Lord is just, and we will all be given our appropriate reward for what we have done in our lives. No matter how unappreciative a husband seems, God sees when we do what HE asks of us. Whenever we fulfill our duties and then give more, God knows. This is a win/win situation, if I've ever seen one. Not only do we have the ability to win our husbands, but we also have the ability to reverence and please the Lord by prevailing in a situation for His sake. How wonderful is that?!

The next issue that Debi discusses is the condition of our hearts, and our thoughts. She brings up the reality that so many of us women replay our husband's failures again and again, no matter how small. He may have only said one thing that we thought was inconsiderate, but after if replays in the mind a few hundred times, suddenly he is the most inconsiderate person on the earth. It's interesting, how that works.

"Commit thy works unto the Lord, and thy thoughts shall be established" (Prov. 16:3)

Ooo... I love solutions. So, how do we overcome those pesky thoughts that we allow to ruin the image we have of our husbands? Pick me! Pick me! *jumps up an down, with raised hand* Our actions will establish our thoughts. It is up to us, how we want to live. I could sit and grump about something that my husband has done, or I can be happy to have him, reaffirm why I am thankful to have him, and work at showing him how much I appreciate him. I'm not just parroting Debi here, or blowing hot air. I have SO been there. Whenever I let the harmful brain chatter loose in my head, I instantly kill my contentment. There will always be SOMETHING that isn't quite right about my husband or what he does. We women have an amazing power to nit-pick. However, when I work at things for the specific point of honoring my husband and treating him well, then my head is put back on the right way, and I am happy and as snug as a bug in a rug.

Lastly, Debi shares a story with us about a woman who was in an abusive abusive marriage. This is always such a hard situation to deal with. The husband was not deserving of the marriage, but Sunny (the wife) felt that God was really calling her to stay in the relationship. I think that it takes a real strong woman to sacrifice that deeply in an effort to honor the Lord. Instead of babbling to everyone about his recent failures and abuse, Sunny began saying nice things about her husband wherever she went. She honored him each day, and the results were quickly seen in a dramatic change in his behavior. As Debi illustrates, some people will take the negative comments of others, and they will make them a prophecy for the future, that they fulfill daily. When Sunny stopped speaking poorly of her husband, and chose to honor him instead, he was motivated to be the good man that she said he was. Eventually, because of her example, she was able to win her husband, and he came to the Lord. (read 1 peter 3:1) Even if he had never become a kinder man, her actions and heart conditon would not have been without merit. The Lord sees it all. None of it is in vain.

 

Chapter 14

Kings and Kingdoms
-A wise woman always recieves her husband's overtures with delight, no matter how clumsy he may be.-

 

Beginning this chapter, Debi talks about the importance of a man having his own place to rule. Man was created to rule in this world, but many times there is little place for a man to express his God-given authority. My first thought was of my husband, during the beginning years of his career, when he was very much at the bottom of the ladder. He had no authority to make larger decisons, and was always under the authority of his own supervisor. When he came home, it was the one place where he was free to "rule the roost" and truly feel like the empowered man that God had created him as. We both stumbled through this time, not sure of how to manage things. Thankfully, we have worked the situation, and when my earthly king comes into his castle, a banquet is set for him. My husband is the king of our home, and I love him as such. We both think that it is cute that our daughter carries the nickname of "princess", since that is just what she is within our home. My husband is my earthly king, and because I care for him and treat him well, he loves me deeply as his queen. I am the queen of his heart, and it is funny how I earned my position. I never would have thought that leaving my comfy chair to fetch him a soda pop would mean a whole lot. However, the small inconvenience yielded much more than the energy I expended to bring him the drink. That is the way that it works each day. The little things add up. Because of these little things, my husband smiles more and has nice things to speak about me when talking with other men. Because I honor my husband as the king of our tiny kingdom, other men approach my husband to ask if I will help their own wife. Ok, I'll admit that that idea is more than a little scary to me. But, the point is that my husband feels honored, it makes him very happy, and his happiness spills out over all of us.

"People say of an obedient woman, 'Oh, she is just the meek and timid type; she needs to get a life of her own."

I try to be an obedient woman. My husband can always tell when I am struggling, or when I have just completely knocked myself for a look with my own stupidity. When chastized, I have this amazing ability to turn into a mute for a moment or more. I think of this as God's way of enabling me to stop and think about what I am doing, before I open up my mouth and dig myself into a hole that will be painful to climb out of. I can be such a troublesome woman. Many people don't really understand the dynamics of our relationship, but there are some things that they see. People see me serving my husband, while other women holler at their men to get their own things. People see me honor my husband by being a caring hostess, and serving guests at our home. People see me honoring my husband by being happy when he is able to do things that make him happy, even when it takes him away from me. Usually, this is accompanied by some rather catty remarks. More than anything, I am deemed unintelligent, spineless, and unworthy of respect. Of course, I know that all of these things are false. What I find more amusing than anything is when people naturally just assume that I am more naturally inclined toward submission than other women. Are they joking?!? *laughs* As I said early, I am as stubborn as a mule and as hard-headed as a mountain goat. Need I mention that I can also be as snappy as a riled rattle snake? Oooo..... I can be one nasty woman. I praise God every time I think about what wonderful things He has done in me. No, I am not a naturally "submissive type" person. I'm very opinionated, think everything should be done my way, and have a real talent for being grumpy. *laughs* The ideal submissive? Oh no.

I am submissive by the grace of God. Only through His help, am I able to do what He has called me to do. I am not any more naturally inclined than the latest radical feminist, but God has worked a number on my heart. Because of Him, I am better able to appropriately respect, honor, and obey my husband. This "submission thing" isn't for wimps. This is some pretty serious work. It's real easy to follow the flesh and be selfish. What isn't easy is to work toward putting others first, foremost God, and then my husband. I challenge any woman who believes that submission is for the weak, to take on the mantel for a while and see how well it wears. :o )

"Reverence is not just how you act; it is how you feel and how you respond with words and with your body language."

Right on! I don't want to be a liar. Do you? No, I didn't think so. However, if I were to present myself as a woman who is reverencing her husband through her actions, and then I am running the nasty brain chatter in my head, I am being two-faced. What is inside is not matching my outside. Believe me, my husband can spot a liar. I can say that I am happy to do something for him, but he will surely see my clenched teeth, or hear the nearly inaudible muttering. Even if I became a master of my mouth, he can still see that the sparkle is gone from my eyes. He knows when the honor I show him is a front, and when it is genuine. I want to show my husband that I love and respect him with everything that I do. Not only that, I want to go that extra mile to show him that I want to give him more than simple 'duty' requires.

Ok, one of the next stories in this chapter has had my eyeballs obnoxiously leaking a bit. Debi talks about people that she watched as they walked into a busy store. One in particular caught her attention because she was dressed in a very unflattering outfit, and was more than a little mussed. However, she was very obviously being adored by her very gorgeous man. As Debi writes, "A man will allow his woman many, many faults, as long as he knows that she thinks he is great."

Oh boy, don't I know it. *laughs* It is no secret that I am not endowed with some great beauty. I seem to be terribly flawed when it comes to matters of fashion, or even coordinating colors. My sister still teases me about mismatched socks, and the fact that I like to wear leggings or slacks under my dresses. I am probably the most likely to be approached by the fashion police. Add to that the fact that I am overweight (not that I'm happy about it. lol), and the fact that humidity does some awful things to my naturally curly hair, I can feel like a tremendously bloated version of "the bride of frankenstein". In contrast, my husband is slender and muscled in all the right places, from his labor intensive job. It sure doesn't hurt that he has such a young and gorgeous face. The guy is just a cutie. To the world, we probably look terribly mismatched. However, this is where Debi has been very right in her statement above. My husband loves me just as I am. He may make teasing comments when he sees me drying my hair in front of the fan in the window (yeah, last night. lol), but I know that he sure doesn't mind my fuzzy hair. He thinks I'm cute. I may be a sort of round girlie, but he likes that I'm soft and huggable. I have lots of flaws, but he is quick to look right past them, because there is no one on this earth who makes him happy like I do. I used to drive myself nuts, worrying that one day he might wake up and just think that I was too ugly to love. There are plenty of guys who shop for girls like they are accessories, like seat warmers designed to coordinate with their vehicle. I miscalculated though. I underestimated just how much it meant to my husband that I respect him and honor him. I make him feel good. No matter what anyone else may think when they look at me, struggling to tame the wild poof, or wandering around with mismatched socks, he thinks that I am just the greatest thing since sliced bread. How cool is that? God has given me this amazing way of endearing myself to this gorgeous guy, to the point that I know he would give himself up for me in a heartbeat. That's some pretty cool stuff. I don't doubt for a moment that it is worth it, taking the time and energy to treat my husband well. Not only does God approve, when I act within His will, I get the benefit of having a husband who carries bricks by the bucket-full, just to build me a flower bed. He wants to make me happy, even if he breaks his back doing it, completely overlooking the fact that some passing guy might think I was far from attractive. Awesome.

"The very heart of reverence is extreme appreciation and profound thankfulness that this man, just as he is, has chosen to love me, just as I am."

Appreciation is a huge thing. There are times when I am not as appreciative as I should be, and I am glad to have a mild reprimand, no matter where it comes from. If the words sting, then I know that I'm in a good place to make improvements from. I am very thankful that my husband loves me, just as I am. I want to keep the perspective of "I am glad to have him", instead of "He aught to be glad to have me". It helps to keep my heart soft, which goes a long way in aiding me in the creation of a comfortable haven for my family, and my husband in particular. I want the first words out of my heart and mouth to always be those of praise and thanksgiving, whether I am singing out to my Lord in heaven, or the lord of our humble home.

Finding Myself in God, Finding Myself With My Husband

When growing up, a great deal of unintentional pressure was put on myself and my sisters. My father most likely did not know what he was doing, but each day he slowly indoctrinated us from infancy to adulthood. We were taught that our name was important, an honor, and it was stated many times that my father had longed deeply over a son to carry on our family name. Interesting enough, he was given only daughters.

As a child, I believed that my name was a large part of who I was, because it carried with it my ancestry. I was not taught to act with honor in all things because it is pleasing to God. Instead, I was taught that I should act with honor as to not disgrace my family name. I am sure that you can see where this would create a great deal of anxiety as I progressed toward marriage as an adult woman.

When I did marry, I chose to take my husband's name, because he told me quite plainly that it would hurt him deeply if I refused to carry his name. So, I put aside my own fears, and changed my name. My heart though, was in a poor place. I was deriving my identity in the wrong place.

It took me a long time, approximately 2 years, for me to have the revolution of heart to realize that my worth has nothing to do with the name that I carry. The Lord loved me before I was born, and if ever there was a worthy name to carry, it would the name of the One who loved me first, and loves me ALWAYS. Labels can be empty, but how could I wear the name of God upon my heart? I could choose to live according to His will, loving Him, loving what He loves, and finding displeasure at what He is angry or sorrowful over. Changing my heart was not a simple process, and it was far from painless. Instead, I felt as though I had the Lord's branding iron pressed into my very soul. The stench and hissing of the iron was the purging of my soul, God's Holy Spirit cleansing me and creating in me a revulsion against my flesh that longs after what is sinful.

How does this connect with my anxiety over my indentity within my marriage? I was able to look, with fresh eyes, up on the Word of God. What the Lord wanted from me became most important, far more important than my personal comfort. So, I stepped out on that limb and began to look at where I belonged. This lead me right to the reality that I am no longer one single person. When my husband and I consumated our marriage, we became one flesh. Whose name should this flesh have? Well, who is the head of our home? Ah.... the big authority/submission debate.

I won't go into the arguments that come every time that those two words are mentioned. Instead, I will simply express that my soul did not revolt upon reading God's Word. My flesh may have had problems, and still does at times. On the inside though, I knew what was right. With the reading that I had done, I had a lot to digest, the idea that I was made for my husband, to be his helper. It was a hit to my ego, but I had to take it in stride. My head was over-inflated anyway. If you are interested in reading more on my thoughts concerning woman's role and purpose, please take a look at my entries to the right, on the "Created To Be His Help Meet" book review/article series.

When I realized what a blessing marriage is, and how it mirrors Christ's relationship with His Church (and that includes me, in a very personal way), it completely changed how I viewed this unique bonding. Since I knew that I was created to help my husband, it only made sense that my name should express my bond with him. In honoring my husband and gladly wearing his name, I chose to honor the marriage that I entered in to. By honoring my husband, respecting his will, and caring for his feelings, I was honoring and respecting God. Hey, this is no small thing. What do I do when I honor and respect God? I wear proudly, HIS name on my heart. In the same way, my husband also wears the name of God emblazed on his heart, when he leans on God for the strength to be a righteous man, and to love me as Christ loves His Church. In spirit, the two of us walk the same path, seeking and longing after the Lord. In the flesh, we are bonded together in body and in name, for the world to see this small representation of a great mystery, the mystery of marriage between Christ and His bride (the Church).

The anxiety is gone. I know where I came from, but more important to me is WHAT I STAND FOR. I can have honor without the name that I was given at birth. More important is the honoring of the name that I was graced with when God's Holy Spirit came upon me and He showed me how to seek and love Him. I will always have a fondness for my family, and the ancestral roots that I have. History is amazing to me, and I love to delve into the great stories to be found. One day, I hope that my family will search out my identity, and will remember me when I am long gone. If anyone ever looks for me, I hope that they find so much more than the last name that I bore. I hope that what makes me remarkable is WHO I stand for. My wish is that when someone sees me now, or a hundred years from now, they see Christ.  

Oh, it was a beautiful day today. I'm not even sure how hot it was, though I know it was somewhere in the low to mid 70s. What a blessing. The last time we had weather so nice, the next day we had snow. Michigan is weird. Anyway, we got a lot done today!

This morning, we slept in late, just because we could. It is nice when we are all snuggled in and then run to the livingroom at 11am to watch Yu-Gi-Oh. Oh, yes, so we are one of those terrible families that watch television. *laughs* This particular cartoon is a guilty pleasure of mine and DH's. We watch faithfully every week, and tape the episode when we have to do something else. Have I mentioned that DH and I have dueling decks, and that we like to take turns whooping each other? *laughs* Yes, we are geeks. It's ok.

After cartoons were over, we all got dressed and went off to our various activities. DD spent most of her time outside, playing in the yard, and running around with the neighborhood kiddos that live two doors down. I did a lot of cleaning today, again, and some yard work. I did take a break in the middle of the day to stand at the curb for the ice cream truck though. That is one good thing about only having one child, that we can afford $1.75 for an ice cream with bubble gum eyeballs.

Oh, I did make an awful mistake today though. You see, I thought that I would do something so COMPLETELY out of character, and I wore a sleeveless shirt today, under my jumper. I thought that I would keep cool better while working. Now I have bright red shoulders, and the skin on my arms feels about 2 sizes too small. DH is teasing me. It was really dumb to go from PALE to LOBSTER. Ouch. So, I'm slathering on lotion and pouting at myself. But, at least I have my flower beds!

I spent some time in the front yard today, working my hoe until my hands started feeling blistery. I did so much work that DH felt motivated, and he carried loads of bricks up front, and bricked in my flower bed. Oh, that man loves me. He has to, to carry bricks by the bucket load, from the garage. We need a wheelbarrow. But, it looks lovely, at least compared to the dirt pits that were there before. Now all I need to do is to come up with some flowers. lol

DH was successful in cutting down the rest of the crab-apple tree trunk today. That thing was a real trial to cut. But, it is finally gone, and DD likes to jump on it as though she can pound it down into the ground. Weird. lol Industrious guy that he is, DH even worked on the little red car today, and got it running better. He was able to take it around the block without it stalling on him. That's an improvement, anyway.

I'll admit that I had a little fit of temper this evening. DH was empathetic though, so it didn't cause any problems. I had called my dad to invite him over for dinner, when I found out that he was out at the marina. So, I was going to hang up with him when he suddenly decided that he could finish soon enough, and that he would be over for dinner at 6:30pm. So, I hurried and put DD in the tub. I also made my ranch chicken, homemade biscuits, peas, and corn. The table was all set, and I was done right on time. I waited for a half hour, trying valiantly to keep dinner warm. I finally called just after 7pm, and dad was just washing his hands after working. He said that his girlfriend was already cooking, so he wasn't going to be coming over. *sigh* Why couldn't he have called BEFORE dinner was done, to tell me that? Why couldn't he have called BEFORE I tried so hard to keep dinner warm, making my family wait for him? Sometimes my dad really upsets me. I invite him over every so often, just because it is important to me, and if he isn't blowing me off for silly reasons, well.... apparently he is standing me up. At least DH was happy because he could eat portion sizes as big as he wanted, because of the extra food that I had prepared.

The rest of the evening has gone well though. DD is asleep, and DH has just gotten home from the video store. I had better go and watch the evening news with him. It's one of our "things".....

*laughs* I said that I wasn't going to visit the internet today, but I am here. DH is outside, working on our little red car. DD tired herself out so much that after I gave her a bath, she wanted to watch her ABC video, and ended up falling asleep. I tried to wake her up, but she's having none of that. lol Oh well, it's Friday. It's no big deal.

So, since I have some time to myself, I figured that I would write about my day before everyone comes in or wakes up. It has definitely been interesting. I started out with a list of things that I wanted to do, and I'm not sure if I actually accomplished any of them. However, I did have a very good day. It HAD to have been a very good day, because I feel like smiling, and I'm so exhausted that I need to type to keep from falling asleep. *chuckles*

My day started late today, just because. *nods* That is one good thing about having an independent only-child, that mornings are usually pretty easy. This morning, I just laid there in bed, enjoying the way that the sunshined bathed the bedroom. I was awake, and content to just lay there and soak it all up. If there is ever a time when I am most apt to be the most content, it is during those first few minutes when I am thinking about coming out of my cocoon of blankets. This morning, DD and the dog both wiggled under the blankets, and we all laid there with the coverlet over our heads. I know, we're weird. Then DD ran off to watch cartoons, and the dog and I gave each other lazy looks and just snuggled deeper into the pillows. *chuckles*

For a short time this morning, I grabbed a book and read in the comfort of my PJs. I decided on "Making Your Home a Haven-Strategies for the Domestically Challenged" by Cyndy Salzmann. (FYI- This book can be purchased through our Choosing Home store) I was really impressed with what I read this morning. I love how the initial focus isn't on decluttering and efficient ways to shovel the garbage out of the house. It really impressed me that the beginning of the book is dedicated to getting ladies back to the Lord, and places such an emphasis on making time for prayer. So, in prime fashion, I set the book down and decided to talk with God for a while. It might make it difficult to finish the book if I keep doing that, but I say that it is an awesomely good trade. *laughs* While I was praying, DD came in and asked me what I was doing. When I told her that I was praying, she said that she wanted to pray too. So, she climbed up in bed with me, and we took turns praying. She's still getting the hang of things, thinking that she is going far out on a limb when she says "Thank you God, for this sandwich" instead of "Thank you God, for this food". *chuckles* She's a good girl. :o )

After prayers, I began putzing around in the kitchen. I took out the garbage, and when I took the bag out, I just decided to sweep the driveway. I know. It sounds weird. That's how work happens with me though. I made my way back into the house and helped DD get dressed in clothes that actually went alright together, and then I noticed that the neighbor boys were out. So, I sent DD out to play with them, and I went to fetch Skippy. I tied the dog on a long leash (actually a lunge line) in the front yard, and the kids just had a ball playing with him. They whipped frisbees at him and played tug-o-war. It was a good time. When the boys went home for a while, I put a padlock on our back gate, and let DD play in the yard for a bit. I worked in the kitchen, washing dishes, scrubbing counters, etc. She thought she had some freedom, but she didn't realize that I was watching her out the kitchen window all of the time. *laughs* But, she had fun playing in her plastic play house.

After I had the kitchen clean, I went to the door to wave out the neighbor boys and their mom, all on their bikes. The mom told me that there was a yard sale the next street over, so I grabbed my shoes, and DD and I walked over to the yard sale. I didn't have much money, but I did get some things. I bought DD an 'Dora the Explorer' set with a "dream pillow, journal, and pen" that was brand new in the packaging, for $2. I was able to find pretty burner covers for my stove for $0.75/package of 2. I also bought DD a children's craft book and a package of stickers, and a dry erase board for myself, all for $2.10. So, we had a nice time "shopping" for less than $6. On our way back home, we saw the nice older lady that we had stopped to talk to on the way out. She was pulling up to the garage sale in her vehicle. It was cute. :o )

After we got home, DD sat at her little picnic table and used her new pen to draw on an activity page while I putzed around with more housework. I was really going to town, and I managed to clean places of my house that haven't been cleaned since we moved in. Hey now, it's only been since December. *laughs* The neighbor boys came back home and invited DD over to play,so after checking with their mom, I let her go over there for an hour. Oh blessedness. It was quiet. wow. So, I hurried and scrubbed the bathroom until I realized that I was cleaning the caulk right off of the toilet base/floor. Ooops. *laughs* I'll have to have DH fix that some time. I am really funny about scrubbing the bathroom. I can't help it if dumb dirt and icky things want to get into the edge of the caulk. It still needs to be clean. He'll just have to run new caulk in a couple months or so. lol

I was sitting on the porch, enjoying some iced water when DD came walking home. Apparently she had pushed the little neighbor girl down, and the mom had told her that she needed to be good and not push people. DD is so shy and funny that she thought that meant that she had to go home. So, she had just told me that the mom told her to go home for pushing. I made her put her shoes back on though, and I marched her over there to apologize. She said that she was sorry, and that she was worried that her friends didn't like her any more. The mom said that things were fine, and that she didn't understand why DD went home. So, we talked for a minute about some of the learning that DD has to do, when it comes to relating to other children and such. I feel like the crazy mom, begging people to like my kid and be her friend. *laughs* Really though, she was just being a child, and she wasn't in trouble. She just doesn't know how to take a mild reprimand from someone other than me. She thought that they wouldn't like her anymore. Poor kid.

After that little episode, it was time to come in and figure out dinner. I ran a bath and scrubbed DD until she was pink again. *laughs* She knows how to get dirty. I put her in some comfy clothes, and then she basically put herself to bed. She's funny. DH and I had dinner together, and we talked about our finances because we had a miscommunication yesterday. He went over into my bill paying territory, and we both paid the car insurance. Oops. That can be a problem when they don't want to refund one of the payments. Car insurance isn't cheap where we live. So, we have that talk every once in a while, "This is YOUR job, and this is MINE." *laughs* We can't afford both of us being the money manager. Heeheehee.... 

So, it is quiet, all except for Wheel of Fortune on in the other room. I guess the rats get to watch tv. lol Oh, speaking of the ratties, they are so much easier to hold now! *laughs* They have such ravenous appetites that they have porked out big time. It is so much easier to fish them out of the cage when they are round. I think that it helps that they have calmed down a whole lot and that they like being rubbed behind their ears. You should have seen me trying to stick both of them in one of DD's little shoe boxes yesterday though. *chuckles* Every time that I tried to put the lid on, one would try to escape. When I was busy with one, the other was sneaking out the other side of the box. It was comical. But, at least their cage is fresh, and I put their hammock back in there for them. They outgrew the house I had gotten them, those round rodents. lol

I think that I am going to go and see about plugging in the sewing machine, so I can work on DD's dress a little today. It is a really simple pattern though, so I might have it done in a short amount of time. I'm still wondering how I get the flower trim on though. *scratches head* They are multi-colored daisies, connected together by one petal on each side. Do I just sew right through the middle of them?? I'm not sure. I don't want to mess it up, but I don't want them to fall off or anything either. I need my grandma. She would know what to do. Maybe I will borrow DH's cell phone and call down to Florida to ask her. lol

.....wanders off...........